Tuesday, 11 October 2011

Ooooo so much to say!

I am sure there must be a rule to a good blog such as keep your waffle to a bear minimum? I don't know, there is an Idiot guide to blogging somewhere in the house but I'll be blown if I get a moment to read it.

Ok so what's the story in Balamory today as the kids tv show says.

Well my son is rolling over on his tummy all by himself at last! My mother spent a military weekend with him,making him lie on a rug on the floor on his front and then on his back demonstrating how he needed to work to roll over. If he moaned she made him stay there! It reminded me of my youth hahaha but I'll never be able to thank my mother and father enough for being tough with me, making me do my exercises, wear splints,practice walking or if I couldn't walk at least stick me on my tricycle!

However now my son is rolling over on his own, changing his nappy now takes quarter of an hour, that's right 15 ridiculous mins about 5 times a day of exhausting wrestling! I nearly cried, I don't do being pathetic and crying into my soup and saying "I can't", I sat on the bed beside him for a min and worked out how to manage this update in his development. I didn't want to shout at him because development is excellent. So I got all books I could get hold of easily and rolled him back onto his back using my head and elbow and stuck a book in his hands instantly. Boy I had to be quick and we still ended up fighting each other. He gets really cross with me being slow and bumbly hahaha, tough! 15mins he was changed and we could sit and then we got down to the pleasant business of reading his books to him and flash cards.

My hubby is ill today,he can hardly move, so I am eating some Turkish delight for breakfast as I type this. He usually helps me get the milk down from the fridge in the morning for cereal but not today and the toaster is too high for me to reach.I've thrown up three times which is what I do every morning because I take Tramadol and we can't get breakfast sorted quick enough because Christopher needs to come first, yet I need my tablets as soon as I wake because otherwise I'm as good as one of those mini IKEA ironing boards, small and not bendy! Ok ok I con seed maybe we need to consider lowering our dignity and getting a blooming carer in when the hubby has surgery,hate having a carer, humiliating and invasive but there we go,my parents come in and help out usually on things neither of us can do but they are getting old and I want them to have a life.

What really makes me mad is,as an arthritic,if you decide to take yourself into a wheelchair because it is less painful and very understandable and get a helper in because it is less exhausting and understandable you are seen as someone who is more deserving of help and advice from professionals. If you struggle on your own, to not want a carer and accept you will be eating tea at 9pm at night after trying to do all with a baby and keep a home and care for one another and my assistant dog etc you are seen as not valid enough for advice/help from professionals on looking after your child, home and personal care,its madness,don't blame any one who needs to have carers and use wheelchairs, of course not but I do blame professionals for being a bit simple sometimes and only responding to visual stimuli.  So the question is, and I hear my family in outrage at me typing this, do we quit? Do what OTs feel is sensible and just sit in wheelchairs all day, one of their big motorised ones they keep giving me and get the state to pay for a full time carer to help us? Or do we continue to try to be independent and accept we are making life more difficult for ourselves by being so but my son will never have to grow up thinking Mummy and Daddy "can't" but instead Mummy and Daddy always finds a way? I don't know. Maybe if we quit we wouldn't have to have so much surgery on our books and not have to go through the heart wrench of leaving our son.

Anyway sorry for being dull and moany god I need to snap out of it, my parents have always said moaners don't make friends which is so true, really who wants to hear someone go on about their health and themselves,so I apologise. No more moaning. We went to a rock gig last night, first night out in absolute ages! My mother baby sat, my best friend came with husband and I,our friend is a professional carer as his job, not our carer just a cheeky friend however he did help get my wheelchair out of the car(yes I know but I have to use it out and about because I can't attempt walking on un even ground as my feet are wonky and I fall over easily,it's ok to fall in the home which I do because I just land on my face on the carpet and my dog helps me back up). There is nothing my friend likes more than to challenge society views, he is cheeky, pushing me up a hill he shouts loudly "you sumo Carrie",I'm 6 stone. On the way into the gig he pushed me into a corner facing the wall and said, right I'm off for a beer haha the look he got from people hehehehe. He didn't leave me in the corner by the way, I like this behaviour it normalises every thing. My husband and I got to the "special folk" place but the bar was too high for me to see any thing so I couldn't see the band but I enjoyed the people watching and the atmosphere. The O2 in Bristol has lovely staff, they whisk you through every one, told me you could get a carer free ticket, I never knew that, so if you live near Bristol peeps and want a night out ask when booking for a carer ticket so you can have your friend along for free! Take a big cushion if you are in a chair and tiny like me cos you won't be able to see over the bar where the wheelchairs are placed.

Ok tomorrow I shall be blogging on car seats, think I need to get this blog back on track which is I am trying to help all disabled parents so you'll have normal me back after this commercial !


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