Friday, 17 August 2012

Fell in the bath,slipped on child's tea set!

Quick interlude post to describe the general nuts that is the life of a physically disabled parent! Normal posts will resume later.

 

Our son needed a bath, Husband was on his last legs, so I came into bathroom to assist with little one in his baby bath. We have a set up of a bath board with slats, that sits across our big deep main bath and a baby bath is put on top of the bath board. Husband holds onto baby and bath as his arms are normal length and grown normally, I do the finer motor controls of washing our child as my fingers have a little more dexterity.

Bath slat board from OT across our bath which has thick ledges around it, husband sits on ledge and holds bath and baby in position.
Bath in position for washing our child.
 

After the usual covering mummy and daddy in water and giggling, we had a sparkling clean little man. I can not lift a wet baby out of the bath ever so that is Daddy's job. I then empty the baby bath by twisting bath on board so plug on baby bath is hanging over board and water can drain freely from it into our big bath. I remove toys and let them dry on a corner of the slat bath board. Now all this usually runs smoothly but not today, oh no silly me, not today!!!

Bath twisted round so baby bath plug over bath board, then plug pulled so water drains into bath without having to lift heavy baby bath of water about etc. Usually works very well!
 

I am currently standing on one leg which has wasted muscles and replaced joints, some of which are old and on waiting list for updating next year, using both arms with broken shoulders, absent shoulder blades and one left elbow in dire need of replacing ,supporting almost my entire body weight via gutter crutches, meanwhile my current replaced ankle is suspended in a dead weight moon boot thing, I twisted baby bath, massively wobbling as I did,thinking I can do this! I stupidly removed one crutch and stood there, whole weight on one crutch and one leg, tried to tip rest of water from baby bath which was only an inch and hardly weighty, but like a game of Jenga it was too much for my body and I tipped up head first in adult bath along with the baby bath,snaked my right eye on the baby bath rim!!!! There I remained calm, legs in air, husband in other room said "are you ok?" where I said "bit of a situation here". Like the giant turnip my husband came to drag me out of the bath! Naked child was sat on the floor wondering what the heck mummy was up to and laughing!

 

Bath time seems to always lead to life mischief times!

Fantastic children's book but the culprit for the next round of bath time mayhem!
 

On a separate occasion, recently, my husband held the bath, this time I thought for some unknown reason, I could quickly grab a few things for our son when he got out the bath so as to avoid him being cold. I went to grab a baby vest from his drawer hobbled back to his bed which took five minuets to do. Lay vest and his towel out on his bed which took two minuets, then thought this room is a total tip and tried to tidy up a few books in a very short time which took ten minuets. I forgot how awful the smallest tasks are when you have no means of walking or getting about a room you are currently in ,let alone trying to get to other rooms in the house. There I was hobbling with one book, "Bored Claude" as it happens, an average sized rectangle book with maximum of twelve pages so hardly heavy. However the way I have to hold anything whilst trying to move my gutter crutches, I have to find a corner of the crutches to support either corner of the book so the book was almost a screen in front of my face! Of course the inevitable happened, I put a crutch on a plastic tea set plate on the floor!!! Bang crutch went under me, I reacted instantly ,to save me falling and braking something, by putting weight on new ankle in cast! One very sore ankle and being told that I now have another six weeks non weight bearing! So so so stupid of me! I kicked myself inside, rang up Adult Social Services to try get some carers as a gut reaction of anger that my husband and I are not given any help and seen as life's determined coping happy people! Fortunately for me I was met with usual red tape of separate numbers to call etc and by then husband talked sense into me and said I just had to accept for a while I couldn't do the usual things with my son, it wouldn't last, he knows that and I know it and having the blue rinse brigade carers coming in, taking away our independence on when we want and how we want to do things is no option! Do we really want our child around people who boil a whole bag of fresh pasta thinking that anything in a bag must be a "boil in the bag" item! Yeah we have had others tell us of such stories!

Messy room, book worm can get all his books down now and they do just that, all come down!
 

 

 

Stupid "Bored Claude" a cracking children's book but was looking untidy and got in my way! Stupid plastic duck that I was trying to shake water out off at the same time as emptying baby bath, stupid plastic tea set plate. That day things were put in the toy box, that day my assistant dog was set to work tidying. That day my dog came in to the lounge and rolled on her back,summing up the general exhaustion of the day.

 

 

 

However through all this we never let our son see the struggles, every situation is dealt with in calm tones, fortunately husband and I can still laugh together at the end of another crazy day and we try to make sure the little man goes to bed with a smile on his face. Not always easy when your body is screaming ago y and eyes need sticks to prop them up but I still say being a parent, no matter what our situation, is the happiest thing to happen to me in my life x

 

 

 

Thursday, 16 August 2012

Clothes for Autumn baby girls 0-6 mths

I have been hunting the shops for lovely accessible girls baby clothes for Autumn/winter 2012. I based the choices here on being easy for parents with severe dexterity difficulties, painful hands to muck about with dressing and also being quick for a parent to dress a chilly child in. I have tried to find clothes with no poppers, nice easy zips or big buttons and button holes.


Baby Girls clothes 0-18 months old:

Tights are very tough if your fingers are painful and grip poor, my husband and I found leggings with thin elastic tops, such as the ones below easy to put on and take off. Leggings with feet are great in winter as the little persons feet remain warm and there are no socks dispersed on the floor that we can't bend to pick up.

Leggings:

 
Leggings with feet from www.mothercare.com
 


 

 
 

Sling over head dresses:

 
From www.next.co.uk Girls newborn section:
Great stretch material with buttons at shoulder which open easily due to material having give at button holes. By opening head hole makes slinging over a child nice and easy :)
 
 
Girls value pull over dress from www.mothercare.co.uk baby girl wear.

Envelope neck long sleeve tops:

are a must for parents with poor dexterity, these tops go well under dungaree dresses. The hole opens right out by simply pulling at the neck, no buttons or poppers around neck to make hole bigger needed to be fiddled with!
Long sleeve envelope neck top www.amazon.co.uk
 
Long sleeve envelope neck top www.amazon.co.uk
These come in several colours and age ranges on Amazon, from pink for girls to navy for boys.
Long sleeve envelope neck top www.amazon.co.uk
My son seems to have a large head and so for my arthritic hands these were a long vest substitute and a great easy solution! I still use these and buy them whether short or long sleeves as they are so easy for me to dress him in.
Long sleeve envelope neck top www.amazon.co.uk
 

Sets:

Dungaree dress with clasps. From www.next.co.uk but you do need a little strength to work clasps.

BEST BUY! Easy pull on envelope open neck dress, ditch the tights, or have a go at them as this dress is only £12 and if tights no good get some leggings instead. From Marks and Spencer's online.
 

Outdoor:

 

Snowsuits:

 

an issue of contention between my husband and I, I loath them because as though it isn't hard enough for me to pick my son up with my short arms, I have to pick him up in this mass of ridiculous material as well which makes my life tricky. My husband says it doesn't matter because our son is warm do here they are just for him!

Double open front zip makes locking and loading your child into these easy, good luck with lifting though! From www.amazon.co.uk
La redoute Ellios snowsuit , single zip down front.
 

If I take my child out on own this is the outdoor gear I choose:

 

Easy zip on fleece, any clothes with zips are a must in my world of parenthood! This one is on offer right now on Debenhams online! Click on top and it should take you there. From Bluezoo Baby at Debenhams.
Big easy button coat, non slip material for easy lifting, warm but not voluminous from Baby girls wear La Redoute online
If you already struggle to pick up your child due to upper limb difficulties then do yourself a favour and avoid waterproof items like the plague ! Your child will be almost ten times harder to pick up I can guarantee it!

 

Zip suits for day wear: - Major necessity for disabled parents to dress their child quickly and pain free.

 

Fleece zip suit:

they are rare whilst we are in summer season but will be in every supermarket and baby store come Autumn.

This is an example of a zip fleece suit from Next.co.uk. A central zip and no poppers makes for quick, painless dressing for both creaky parent and child.
 

Cotton Zip suits for warmer months:

These are a relatively new species of clothing but work in exactly the same way as the fleece ones, a central zip going all the way down, put child in and zip up, easy as that! I have awful dexterity and pincer grip so if I can do them I feel they are a solution for many! I can even use my teeth to do zip up on bad day!
Cotton zippy suits from www.zippysuits.com
 
Cotton zippysuits are rare to find full stop in the UK, these are available from www.zippysuit.com
Pretty light pink suit from www.zippysuit.com
 

Velcro Baby vests and baby grows:-

Available in pink for girls under premature range of baby vests both in store at Mothercare or available on their online store at www.mothercare.com. They go from premature up to Newborn size.
 
 

I would not want to take all the joy and excitement out of any one choosing clothes for their first baby, I hope my suggestions at least help you on a search for clothes. Poppers may be no issue for some reading this in which case you can go town, however for those that know they will struggle with fiddling around trying to do one popper (just stand in baby store and try a new baby vest to see if you struggle) there are lovely clothes out there. You don't need to feel left out, your child will look as cute in a zip suit and hat as it will in frilly dresses.

 

Look around but the key to finding easy clothes before you have your child in your arms is to look for stretchy fabrics, large buttons, zips or elastic.

I just want to end this post by saying to disabled parents to be, never listen to any one tell you you won't be able to manage, this is absolute rubbish. We have to do things differently to our well counterparts but does anyone care as long as our child is safe and well looked after!?! I bath my baby in a baby bath sat on top of a bath board which is over our bath, my well friends do not do this but they think it is cool I bath my child in my way, my son doesn't care how Molly down the road is bathed, my Occupational therapist told me she stopped bathing her children at 8 months and sat them with her on the floor of a shower so they could both get cleaned and she was a well mother just on her own a lot! People don't care if your child is in a pink zip suit or a pink dress, they just see a happy,cute baby. Do not get upset about how you will be as a parent, you will be great, there are so many great practical solutions in normal high street or online stores that the chances are there will be at least three ways to do something that suits you and your child, using items already on the market available to all parents, able bodied or not.

 

X

 

 

Tuesday, 14 August 2012

Latest helpful gizmos in baby care and wear.

It is important this blog moves with the latest gizmos and gadgets, buggies and easy dress, lovely clothes on the market, in the high street and online now!

 

Don't forget that sales are on now too so stock up on clothes for next year for your child in order to save money because as a disabled parent you have to make savings where you can to buy all the equipment you need to independently parent.

I also absolutely must bring your attention to a hire baby equipment web site, this is ideal for us disabled parents to see if a product will work well for us before we waste any money:

www.jigglygiraffe.co.uk

 

This company asks for a deposit down and depending how long you borrow an item for ( to be quite honest you can tell if an item is worth buying or not in the first two hours of using it), a day rental will cost you £1, £5 for the week etc. They have the legendary top "DisABLEd Positive Parent" recommendation of a "BUMBO" seat, hooray!

 

Here are some latest interesting products from across the board of baby shops:

 

Aquapod

 

 

For babies that can sit up. This mat supports your little one whilst you get on with washing your child. If like me one arm really only works a bit to do useful jobs then this mat allows you to get on. Always supervise child in a bath no matter what seat or aqua pod they are in.

 

Puj Tub Folding bath for over a sink!

Wow! Where was this gizmo when I needed it!?! Basically this is thin foam that is soft to touch and malable,that you can fold out to sit new born in sink securely and comfortably. It's got very shallow sides to get baby out if you have short arms or painful elbows etc. As it's use is designed for in a sink it is at a great height for parents in a wheelchair (persuming you have a sink at your height) or parents who struggle to bend down to bath a child in baby bath in floor etc.

 

Bed guard:

These are not new items, you may find these a genius can't live without piece of kit when your little one is crawling and you can not play on the floor but have to make do with a bed as your floor substitute to play. We have a single bed in our sons nursery jammed in a corner of his room so two walls surround head board and one side of bed, a bed gaurd can secure the other side, behind you use common sense! These will come in useful when you chuck out the cot so not a waste of money in my opinion.

 

Travel high chairs:

 

Bumbo seat and play tray-



You know this is my top bit of kit due to no fiddly straps and holding a child securely, even one that needs support to sit! They have trays that you have to buy separately however until your child is eating finger food which doesn't happen until eight months I wouldn't waste the extra money on a tray myself.

 

Munchkin Travel Booster Seat.

 

You have to consider your child's age and development and temperant as a parent. The Bumbo is good whilst a child is not a wriggler and heck why bother with straps on Highchairs if your child knows to sit still and fits its Bumbo!

 

There will be a time where you need a chair which can either sit right up to a table or has a tray and annoyingly they all come with straps. So buy the Munchkin or Mothercare travel seat second hand so the fastenings are loose enough to do and undo very easily with painful unstable fingers.

 

However this seat is one of the easiest I have tried, I have a very quiet sensible, listening,gentle little man AT THE MOMENT and so I would put his meal beside this chair, then slip him in and to heck with doing extra straps!

Or Mothercare own travel booster folding Highchair.

 

Honestly my son always eats well, this was only take because it was his first real cake!
I would recommend getting this chair second hand because there are straps to do but the tray literally rips of and on! No tricky levers to pull or push under tray to take tray off.

 

Otherwise, if you insist on buying new, you must be able to hold a metal nail file and get filing the prongs on the fastening belt, by filing the prongs down on the buckle you will find it clips open and clicks shut with ease. This took. My arthritic husband took three hours to file down but his hands look like this!

 

We don't bother with full high chairs as the levers to push and pull to remove the tray, the height of them when I am four foot nine and need to sit to feed my son etc. Also errr who lives in huge houses any more where we can store all this baby junk?!? Foldable, bijou seems the way forward!

 

Clothing:

 

Zippysuits:

 

Oh www.zippysuits.co.uk how I worship at your altar! At last a lightweight cotton baby grow onesie with no poppers just a nice easy to use zip. No more struggling with pain shooting in fingers as you try desperately to do a popper up and there are ten more to go! Great for daywear on cooler spring or autumn days.

 

Wooly Comforts.

I try to find both practical items that work for disabled parents and support lesser known businesses.

A must have clothing item for dribbling babies and if changing a child is a massive ordeal, really hurts your joints, this will at least protect the top end of your child's clothes getting wet.

 

These lovely patterned dribble bibs are of better quality than well known brands in my opinion because they have thick Terry Towling backing the lovely colourful material at front. They also do up with Velcro rather than awful poppers which many of the more well known brands use.

 

Sleepsuits-

 

Some sleep suits are a total dexterity nightmare so if you are unsure of what you can manage, first time round go and look at sleep suits. However here is are two examples of do able sleep suits with poor hand movement or strength, do able because they are zip from bottom up which means you haven't got such a fiddle trying to bring the zip together, if you don't get what I mean you soon will when you go look at bags in person!

Front zip open bag £14.99 from Zazdas.co.uk
 
 
www.bambinodirect.co.uk £23.39
 
 

There are some lovely accessible clothes coming out in the UK shops for our little darlings. I will be doing a blog on this tomorrow. How come there are always such lovely clothes for girls and boys always an array of grey, blue and black !?!

 

x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Monday, 13 August 2012

It's a bit difficult!

So every parent right now, with children on holiday in the UK, will understand when I say "it's a bit tricky doing anything with little one permanently buzzing around"!



I am reading a book, an excellent read, called "Politically Incorrect Parenting" by Nigel Latta. He is a Psychologist who not only has brought out this book for babies and toddlers, also has written one for teenagers and also writes a regular column about his antics as a parent. He writes about having to hide in his two year old daughters Wendy House with the window blinds closed just so he could dictate his latest column on to his iPhone for one minuet! Little one found him in two minuets, called him smelly poo poo face and with that he went with little one into town.



It is difficult to do any thing for me at the moment but I always do my best, I feel for my husband as he is having to care for me and our son and is ill himself however we club our resources together and get through a day with a happy giggling and chatting little man at the end of it still.



Of late though our concerns are about Christopher not walking. Suddenly conversations turn into a bit of "well you shouldn't do this",not always too productive! So we sat down once and formulated a plan because Mark is going to end up very ill and in hospital unless we pull something out the bag and fast! Without my husband around frankly we will have no choice but to get the brigade of carers in our locality over, some of these guys have been known to try and cook pasta actually by dumping whole bag of pasta in a boiling pan thinking it was boil in the bag,not entirely sure I want them around our son!





I feel immense pressure to fill Christopher's day with entertainment, I despise the use of technology to solely entertain him and feel guilty when we end up resorting to using TV. I try to play with Playdoh, water, I read at least ten books a day, we do sticker books, we do IPad apps together, we pretend to feed Chilly the snowman plastic food, pour cups of tea for Chilly who promptly melts so we pretend to put him in his toy box aka a Freezer to make him better. Then thought hmmm bad message so now we give Chilly ice cream and no hot drinks.

Chilly does not look as white and new as he does here thanks to him being given Playdoh to eat, taken outside for cuddles, good old trust snowman.


My entire play I worry about, am I doing enough, is it good enough what I do, are good messages included, is it helping him learn anything. So I accept my husbands point I try to do too much and what it seems to be resulting in is a child who feels no need to walk as mummy doesn't walk and mummy is still fun!



Today we are applying a new system although reader please note my husband has just taken son out for a push round to the postbox so not sure new system is strictly being applied! I have spent 30 mins entertaining our son, Daddy spent 40 mins with him on the Aquadoodle mat, then we left our son to his own devices, he played by himself for 30 mins before whinging. So we opened the safety gate to our little mans room, put the Ottoman across the stairs and he is currently crawling around my bed as I try to write this!



Already since trying to ignore his cute ways he has discovered our mirror can be fun!





We hope the new system of more time on his own to entertain himself will encourage him to get walking!



If he doesn't next years events include:



Two new knees for me, needing doing anyway they are just old replacements that I have at the moment, last done when I was 16.

Husband needs ankle fusions because of lifting son around.

I need a new shoulder



However any person wanting a baby who is disabled, wondering if it is worth it? Oh you bet!!! Both of us would have surgery every other day if we had to because every bit of sharing our sons life is worth it and very rewarding!







Sunday, 12 August 2012

Disabled parents, an encyclopaedia of knowledge is out there waiting for you.

A quick post, please watch this video clip of Hollyoaks actress-Kelly Marie who is physically disabled in life and has a lovely baby girl:

 

There is help out there but it is so ridiculously hard to find, if you don't know what to type into facebook, twitter or blogspot etc then how do you access all the great advice out there? So in a few weeks time I will be doing a post for exactly this reason.I will be spending as much time as possible to find useful groups on Facebook and great blogs full of support and wisdom for disabled parents, to link to with a click of a mouse button.

 

There are medically based organisations out there which offer help, however they tend to focus on how to get carers ,which not all of us feel would be useful, or where to purchase a £2000 electronic cot that meets all disabled parents needs, this is neither the case, nor affordable for the masses nor necessary. I want a place where a busy sore parent does not need to wade through a lot of posts about DLA or ATOS when they are just despairing that they can not work a single buggy in a shop, that there are solutions and they can be accessed quickly.

 

There is a lot of advice, support and great ideas out there from mothers and fathers, over one weekend I have found several blogs and groups on facebook that have been great for me especially as getting out to see my able bodied friends is especially difficult at the moment, they have given me warmth and shared my frustrations and worries and ideas. I know I sound a revolutionist but it's time we all get helping other new disabled parents so they don't feel overwhelmed or lost like many of us did when we got home with baby and were even met with Health Visitors looking a bit aghast and uncomfortable as to what to suggest.

 

Guess I should get on with my walk through cyber space, I may be sometime, have a lot to do so if you can help me by telling me about great groups or blogs that help you, whatever your disability, please email me at SunCarrie77@hotmail.com.

 

Right now though am saying goodbye to great London Olympic games 2012 and hello equally brilliant London Paralympic games!