A fantastic valentines day.

A heart and a chocolate waiting for me on my pillow when I went to bed, bless.

I finally took my son out on my own on Feb the 14th, a truly lovely way to celebrate Valentines Day, yes that sounds odd I know, I know my husband loves me, I love him, we show that every day in little ways or big, he will buy me a box of chocolates out of the blue, I will cook a cake for him etc. However, to be able to take out the best thing my husband or any one has ever given me in life, my son, on my own was just so lovely I can not put it into words.

Maxi Cosi Axiss,whole seat swivels to face the car door entrance. Available every where,I got mine from  Precious Little Ones.

So off we trotted, first I put him in my super light buggy from Babies R Us (A calypso stroller), wheeled him to the car, got him in his Maxi Axiss all by myself, folded the stroller up and off we went. First stop was the library. I was shaking like a leaf when we parked up,I was so nervous of getting him out of the car and into his buggy with literally no one who knew me any where around, however I unfolded buggy, managed to get him out of the car seat and all was well.



The drawback of the Callypso, it is the only drawback, is that the wheels do not swivel. The easy fold and unfold system of kicking a bar up and down, the light weight ness of it is fantastic. However, by the end of the library visit, I was in agony as I was struggling to lift the buggy with him in it onto the back wheels to keep turning the stroller around corners. So I went to Mothercare to get a new stroller.

Mothercare was useless, a really poor selection of buggies were on display, their lightest weight ones had a ridiculous safety button to press in before you could kick the bar down to unfold or fold the buggy, it was lightweight but no good as my hands could not manage to push the safety button. No staff came to me to help me look at buggies but I could see that most of those on display were big, heavy and lots of buttons to push, levers to pull gadgets to fold up the buggy that my hands couldn't work.

So I went to Argos, I never go to Argos but gosh am I so glad I did and purely because of one excellent sales assistant called Laura S at St Oswalds park in Gloucester. I sighted two potential strollers from the catalogue in store, I explained to her I had arthritis and asked if I could just have a look at them. She was so helpful. Smiley, happy to help, happily undid all the ridiculous packaging each had on them. She showed me how to unfold,then I had a go. She was just so upbeat, just made the looking at both models a joy rather than how some sales people make you feel, like you are a real nuisance or in most cases they completely hide from you, she happily came out with me to the car to help me put the new buggy in, we were smiling at ridiculous complicated buggy designs today etc.

Babystart Pushchair with canopy,swivel wheels,available in pink or black-from Argos-£29.99

 I happily brought one of these brilliant buggies, a "Baby Start" model, there are two from Argos,both as light as the Calypso,easy step on a bar at back to fold buggy out and kick it up to fold it up again system, I went for the £29.99 Baby Start buggy as I felt although it was almost identical to the cheaper £19.99 model it came with a sun shade, looked tougher material,also had a rain cover but above all lovely swivel wheels.
BabyStart Basic pushchair-Argos- no canopy still swivel wheels, £19.99
I brought the buggy ,not just because it had every thing but also because the sales person was a real gem. I have been to John Lewis at Cribbs Causeway Bristol, where I usually shop, no sales person has ever come over to help me! I have been to Mothercare in Gloucester and it has been the same story there. When I see a gem I have decided to publicize it. People deserve recognition when they make a difference for the better for someone else. Laura S from Argos St Oswalds Retail Park, Gloucester is certainly a gem and a reason why I will go back to that Argos again.

I think Britain and its populous is very quick to point out what isn't good, what doesn't work, who is not getting what or who is getting what. Life is far too short to be bitter and sour, I hope I will be able to add many more gems onto my blog, from the high street or as I meet them in my daily life.

Good night x

Safety blog.

Oh I yawn at the mention of health and safety, god I always think of a man with a clipboard in hand, yellow bob the builder hat adorned and speaking in monotone. The whole concept makes me sleep! However I have a one year old who can crawl from the middle of his big bedroom to Daddy's office in 11 seconds! It was time to face facts and start thinking safety gates,plug protectors, corner cushions etc.

Husband and I sat down a few nights ago and had a conversation over what the heck we should do about it all. We were currently taking it turns to follow our son around the house herding him away from unsafe places, objects, dog trying to snooze and so on. It was getting a tad ridiculous. So here are our tried and tested and found and hated and general confusing area of the baby safety world.

• SPRING LOADED SAFETY GATES- simple word- Rubbish! Hard to push open because of the spring, usually have a bar going along the bottom of the gate so if you are wheelchair bound you won't get any further than the gate unless you can pick your chair up, lift it over the gate step etc. 

•  "No trip gate",non spring loaded- great! No step at bottom of gate to go flying over, to struggle over on crutches or a barrier to wheelchairs. Non spring loaded gates work just like a garden gate. There is a lever knob to push down with one hand and push gate through with other hand. I have very arthritic age five year old sized hands, I have little grip or strength in fingers but I could work this style of gate.

• Google your local council to see if they run a free health and safety baby home check.Gloucestershire County Council runs such a scheme. What a fantastic scheme, it basically involves a safety bod coming out to check your house over, discuss safety equipment that you can often buy from them at exceptionally good prices, they will even fit the gates and other equipment for free!!! Your health visitor will be able to give you details of your local council safety check scheme if one is available in your area. This service was especially useful for us two ,creaky parents, as their staff take your difficulties into account when recommending items to you, they have a non trip gate for you to try which is invaluable. It is difficult to find a store that displays gates.However IKEA and John Lewis do.

• You can get easy access playpens which tend to be hexagonal  in shape.The pens come with a non spring loaded gate that swings open meaning no reaching to get your child out is required. There is a very very minute step across the bottom of the gate entrance. It may there for now be ideal for a wheelchair parent however by aged one your child probably would happily just crawl over the small step over if you hold the gate open for him hopefully meaning you can then grab your child once through the entrance of the pen. 

Safe and secure metal playpen from www.amazon.co.uk

BabyDan Baby Den -my favorite pen as for me it has the easiest latch to open. Available from all baby high street/online shops.

• Plug protectors -have to be brought and all of them are tricky in all honesty. The common ones are the two below. The "Clippasafe socket cover" was the easiest for me to use, the other type readily available are flat plastic circles that plug into the empty plug socket. I found the round plastic disks difficult with poor dexterity and strength in my fingers. Neither are ideal for arthritic parents or those with weakness in hands but  they are an absolute must have for your childs safety so you will have to choose between the lesser of two evils.

Clippasafe electrical socket protector, has two buttons either side which you gently push and raise lid up,
available from www.amazon.co.uk

Common plug protectors on market. 

Finally we actually don't have the BabyDan playpen but it is basically the Baby Dan configure gate in hexagon shape, same easy mechanism. We have gone for creating a safe corner on one side of our chimmney breast in our lounge as we felt frankly with an open log fire, flat screen tv, wii, digi box, dog etc there was far too much to safety proof and would end up proofing against my husband and I! So we took a BabyDan configure gate and did the following, it works so well, my son can play, see the television, every thing is protected from his little hands.

Our BabyDan configure gate  set  up,works so well!

Space for our son to move and play. 

Easy pull up latch, very light pulling on the latch bar required to open gate. 

Very tiny little lip across the entrance.

We have completely safety proofed our sons whole bedroom which is a large room. His door entrance has been kitted out with a non trip door gate from the Health and Safety scheme with Gloucester City Council, we have corner protectors which are no problem to pop on corners of drawers,these are available on the high street,we have put flat plug protectors in every plug in his room. He can explore that room entirely on his own, when he is not in his pen area in our lounge we will watch him like a hawk!

It is ridiculous to expect parents with poor dexterity to gate every where, put plug protectors in every plug, fireguard gates that are a fiddle and huge, take up a huge space if you are in a wheelchair you would need to consider that. We will have a gate on our lounge entrance to stop little man getting out and about into the kitchen or any where else down stairs.

TV flat screen straps, available from all retail shops offering baby safety items.

We won't gate every room, we will put flat screen tv belts on our tv to stop him pulling that off. These attach at the wall bracket on the back of your tv and then fix to the wall.  

Ok so I love this stage in my son, as a Psychologist I enjoy the cognition that babies display at this age, I like that he mimics what I say, I told him he was being a cheeky little monkey today, he smiled and said "cheeky". Made me feel all warm inside. I love the fact he wants to read a book more than play with a plastic toy, when I bring his pile of books into him in the morning to read with him he reaches out to the pile. However with ever developing cognition comes a desire to explore and BOY IS IT EXHAUSTING haha. 

To all those that think work is strenuous,please! Try waking at 6am and straight into action, no cups of tea to wake up, no coming around from your sleep slowly or getting dressed straight away, no sitting still until the little darling goes to bed at night where by you try to catch up with household chores, my husband tries to paint, I try to shoot off a blog,walk dog,load dishwasher, hoover,put baby toys away. Mayhem indeed but would not change it for the world and I guess who in reality, at work, has a boss that smiles, giggles with them, wants a cuddle and enjoys being with you twenty four seven!?! My husband, son and dog mean the world to me, would not change a thing about it. 

Sad

Well today I am saying fairwell to my sons first car seat, the maxi Cosi pebble, won't be too sad as sold it and was not really ideal for a disabled parent to get son in and out of.

I have sworn at the seat many a time but saying fairwell shows my only child is growing up.

My saddest fairwell will be when my child's "Bumbo seat" sells on Preloved. This has been an essential item in my mind for any new disabled parent. The seat holds your child from four months old in a seated position with no straps to fiddle with. It is light weight so can pick up easily and take any where. It has meant I could sit my son in it knowing he was very safely held and get on with jobs. I fed him in it as was easier to use than a highchair with straps to do up etc. Ho hum big sigh and a fond farewell. I hope another parent gets some use out of it, as I say a disabled parent should buy one as a baby care essential item along with a cot and buggy.

We almost said goodbye to our cot which I won't sell on as the side of it dropped out yesterday! My sons cot base had to be lowered the day before as he sits up on his own, crawls etc and the cot couldn't cope with change. It just spat out the side! I was worried once the base was lowered as I could no longer manage to get my son out, but the cot helped me by throwing it's side off as my husband decided to gate it. As a result I can get my son out again, the whole side swings open, hinged one side and bolts top, bottom and middle other side. Works so so well! Really pleased! So no goodbye cot yet, phew.

My son is now 1 year old, he can crawl from one room to another in eleven seconds! It is manic, my husband can get my son from the floor but I can't so I currently follow him around herding him in the direction that is safe. However I love this stage because whilst exhausting, he babbles away, loves songs, laughs lots and is developing little boy mischief, diving under a duvet and giggling when I ask "where is Christopher?".

Maxi Cosi Axiss seat came in an all far too stiff newness,the straps were impossible to adjust for both my husbands hands and mine so I had some one pull at the straps 100 times which has loosened them. We should have brought second hand, we should have learnt by now but we worried a second hand car seat would be dangerous but people sell them in great condition and not having been in a car accident etc. Still all is working now and I can manage it all but need to wait for snow to go for my son and I to try.I still say it is the only accessible car seat for nine month upwards children, all accessible except the newness of straps!

Now looking at safety gates and that is a separate blog as have to let you all know about a nationwide service where safety for baby is concerned but will blog later about this.

Night night all creaky and nimble parents x

Chocolate orange and a big thank you.

Well now I am sat munching on my chocolate orange and in my inbox I find that I have been awarded the "Versatile Blog" award by oddparent many thanks Mette and have a big slice of this lovely chocolate orange which I am posting through my usb port as I type to get to you. Seriously thank you.

I shall be spreading the love shortly by passing it on to 15 more worthy blogs but please check out Oddparent as she is another happy lady on the pathway of parenthood showing we all do it with a smile and a joy in our hearts.

Now I need to make some kind of Oscar winning speech about me and break it into media bite size 7 things about me so here goes:

1. Love White chocolate orange, yum yum yum.

2. I have had arthritis since I was 15 months old, what isn't already a plastic joint soon will be! I swallow tables and have an injection regularly in the week which is my super fuel to help me be a little less creaky but I still make Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz, when he was rusty, look like an athletic soul!

3. I love my one year old son, he really is my pride and joy. I love his big baby eyes, his normal looking legs, hands, arms, neck,back. I love his little giggle at the dog coming up to him and his funny way of clapping his hands like me, I can't clap normally but he doesn't know it isn't the normal way, as far as he is concerned I am Mummy and I must be right and so he claps like I do with gusto at "Happy and you know it".

4. I have learnt so much through being a mother, such as most baby equipment has never been designed with any thing less than 100% fit in mind but you laugh it off and adapt it, take a chain saw to it or swear at it out of your childs hearing then gulp a calming cup of tea down.

5. I have an assistant dog from Canine Partners. She is a godsend with my son, she spends so much of a day picking up toys for him, getting washing in and out of washing machine, she is a real friend of mine, gentle and thoughtful, sometimes a bit over protective and boy can she nag me sometimes when I feel down to cheer up, by licking me or tickling me with her big soft ears.

6.I love people, I guess it helps I am a Psychologist but I really have learnt little from a degree and more from having been an ill child, ill teen and ill adult, I really do understand difficulties, struggles, those who have not or are not having life easy and I have a genuine drive,desire to help and reach out to those people who don't have life from an Ideal Home magazine. Most of all I

7.Love my husband,son,mother,father,sister, brothers and friends all of whom make me laugh, make me feel loved,make me feel irritated but make me feel normal.

Really that is me. I thank you again Oddparent and shall now put forward my 15 noteworthy blogs that have gotten my attention,some have made me cry actually especially the blogs about children suffering as I share too much memories with their plight. I am going on a theme here because I really feel that there needs to be a community of help for disabled parents but equally for those parenting disabled children all in one easy to access place. I hope by raising awareness of these blogs we are all becoming informed,before I launch into some hippy 1960s get together song here are my nominations:

Award for the Most Versatile Blog goes to:

http://www.rheumatoidarthritisguy.com/

http://www.mamasick.com

http://theseatedview.blogspot.com

http://rawarrior.com

http://thecoffeeklatch.com/the-dsm-v/

http://parenting-with-a-disability.blogspot.com/

http://mommy-multitasking.blogspot.com

http://raisingadisabledchild.blogspot.com/

http://www.disabledmom.com

http://thehappycripple.com/

http://learnermom.com/

http://inthefringes.wordpress.com

http://samedifference1.com/blog/

http://graciesmumastoryofamumwithms.blogspot.com/

http://www.msworld.org/forum/showthread.php?p=1266007

Thanks to Oddparent for being a supported to my blog. I hope I can also do the same for your blog and these others, I really think if we all look into others thoughts and feelings, hopes etc we all learn a bit and gain better consideration for others.

Keep smiling lovely parents x

A difficult choice.

The dreaded vaccination letter fell through our doorstep for Christopher just after Christmas. It has been sat up on the fridge as a thing to do but actually is being put off !

When I was 15 months old I had my vaccination and at the same time seemed to turn into a happy baby, walking, pulling stuff from shelves into a child that went pale over night, had fevers that never have left, rashes on me and swollen knees and ankles. My parents went to their GP. The GP didn't know what it was, they just told my mum it was a developmental phase, to go home and give me Calpol.

This didn't do any thing! Around the same time as my vaccinations I was also stung by a bee on my head apparently ,so my poor immune system was clearly massively under attack and no wonder it went into mega overdrive. Some months passed, my first word was "hurt" and all I did most of the day was point to my knee and say "hurt".

Eventually I got an ear infection which the doctors thought might have been the problem, I was nearly aged 2. I had grommet surgery and I came out completely swollen in all joints with high fevers that they couldn't control easily. Then and only then did it dawn on the medical profession that my mother never has been nor ever will be one of those silly drama people, clearly her child was very ill. I don't know what happened then but I was kept in Bath hospital for weeks, my parents were so frightened, they took me out for a walk with them into Bath and they stood outside the Bath Abbey not aware of anything or any one around them, both sat there desperately worried that I might have a terminal illness.

Fortunately I didn't! I have a debilitating illness that changes with the wind so one day I can stand up and walk about with ease, the next day I am stuck on nasty NHS crutches and in an old biddies electric scooter! I go from lively looking,petite woman, to ancient old hag in 24 hours hahaha. However my parents have said to me recently that they were elated when I got my diagnoses for Juvenile Arthritis as they knew you couldn't die from the illness. I don't think they had much of a clue about child arthritis or the madness to come, the year in traction on my bed being schooled at home, the endless surgery and months spent in hospital in London, the nutty splints I had to wear at night and calipers on my legs in the day,the help I would need to get dressed, helped on to the loo and off, help washing my hair etc. However we all muddled through it. I had a bit of a shout during my teenage years as frankly who wants to be 15 and needing help on and off the bog. My dad who rarely looses his temper, saying to me in the hallway to "bloody well walk" on two sticks I had been given and was struggling to use. I hated him that day aged 16, went to my room and cried feeling fat and useless. I don't think I can ever thank him enough for that though because it made me think right you bloody old git I will walk and I practiced standing in my room on my own at my table and then with my mum. I haven't looked back since!

Now I am the parent, I must decide whether I want my son to have these vaccinations, the possible cause of my illness.He has two parents both with severe youth arthritis so I guess he may be more predisposed towards getting it himself. Equally I need to tell myself that it would have been far worse for my parents to return from sitting outside Bath Abbey to be greeted by a doctor saying I had meningitis so I know what I should do really.  Any way if he gets arthritis, what more could an arthritic child ask for, two parents who really do understand how hard it can be, who can show him you can do any thing, it makes no difference how bad your joints are that day, rubbish joints do not need to stop you living a happy good life.

I can hear my son awake, before I go and get him up I shall pick up the phone and call the GP practice, get him booked in.

                                         

Detox

Right time for some me time.

I may have the added advantage of swallowing Pacman every day in the form of an anti inflammatory that eats every thing I eat and if nothing in my stomach will eat stomach lining! However I still want to keep petite and light on my feet for the sake of my old replaced joints and now am carrying a baby about I need to be double careful. So I am in detox, spring cleaning my body.

I tasted Green tea for the first time, why do things that are good for you taste rubbish!?!
I also purchased pure blackberry and blueberry fruit juice as these are also good antioxidants and immunostimulators. I am also taking some supermarket own vitamins and minerals along with another tablet which is Olive leaf extract which claims scientific evidence as an anti biotic, anti fungal and antioxidant. So in two weeks I hope to be blogging about the huge energy level I have, how I feel as strong as Popeye and look ten years younger as well as fairy light on my feet. I am sure all that is not much to ask being that I am putting effort and money into all these potions!

Off to drink some Blueberry juice now.

x

Health visitor motor skill check up

Today was Christopher's year old check up/MOT to see if all things motor skill were working as should be.

Long story short all is on track perfectly. She and I were surprised being that there is no one available in this house, not even healthy assistant dog, who can do much physical play with him but I had a door frame bouncer (had two but only the "Tippitoe" is workable for my husbands bonkers hands), which he has been using since he was six months old, a "Bumbo" seat which is sold as a seat designed to encourage your child to learn to sit independently which he has been in since 5 months and a fantastic walker which actually puts a child in standing position called "Babylo walker" since six months.

All the above items are great aids for parents who struggle because of their mobility issues,in getting their child to do some of those physical tasks such as sitting on own and weight bearing.

I was given a paediatric Physio self referral card today and "parents to be" this is important. If you are completely unable to put a child in a walker or door bouncer (I can manage putting son in walker but the husband has to be on door bouncer duty) then think about self referral to a paediatric Physio probably when your child is reaching three months. Talk it over with your Health Visitor when they come and visit at the three month stage.If you know you will find it hard to be able to get your child weight bearing it is no shame, heck our children will get ten books read to them a day and lots of time instead and many mums find that hard to do, get your child referred! A paediatric Physio will be able to advise you of exercises that you can or should be able to do with your child to help move on your child's motor skills, they will assess your physical difficulties in moving your child and work with you. This week I have felt a failure up until the health visitor came, I haven't got the only car seat I can manage yet, the order is taking forever, so still not been able to get my son out, was worried Christopher was not standing on his own etc. However I need not have worried so here is another tip don't worry, you can only do what you can do and your child will get there in his own time but equally don't listen to any one around you who has babies because they will be not very usefully telling you what their child did at aged one and most of it will be an opportunity to boast!

Verbalising, well my son takes after me and babbles for England, smiles and now says the word "Doggie"! So we have "Duck", "Doggie" and "Tedd". I wish my ankle joint would hurry up and land on my surgeons desk (maybe the same company used to deliver my axiss car seat are being used to deliver my ankle joint!) there is so much fun and life out there to be had that I really need it now, not for me, for my son, I want him to have the childhood fun that I couldnt have as a child but will make sure I can try and share in with Christopher.

Happy Able Parenting all x